What is Open Adoption?
Julie McGue
Author
I am an adoptee from a closed adoption from the Baby Scoop Era (post WWII through 1980s), so I’m not familiar firsthand with the specifics of open adoption. Open adoption was not an option available to adoptive parents in the late 1950s. There was closed adoption and private adoption, and the end result was similar: little or no personal or identifying information was passed on to either the adoptive or birth parents in order to protect the rights and privacy of all parties.
One of the goals of my Touched By Adoption blog is to educate readers, and myself, about the complex issues that surround adoption. I came upon this post recently and decided it needed to be shared. While it is full of useful information for current prospective birth parents, I am in no way advocating for this group. It is presented for informational purposes only.
Birth Parents Blog
4 Steps to Open Adoption
Posted by Lifetime Adoption on July 19, 2019
We recently received a text from an expectant mother on our 24/7 text line that read, “I’m texting because I was curious about the process of an option adoption. What are the steps?”
When women call, text, or email to learn about open adoption, it is usually because they are pregnant and considering adoption for their babies. The steps to an open adoption can be broken down into 4 parts:
1. Learn about adoption.
We can mail (or email!) a packet of information that includes a short book, So I Was Thinking About Adoption, that explains what an expectant mother’s journey is typically like through adoption. We will also send you information about waiting families who are open to adopting your baby. This gives you an opportunity to see what type of life they are ready to provide to your child.
As you learn about adoption, you can also think about the type of contact you’d like in the future. Letters and photos, email, phone contact, social media connections, and even visits are all possible with open adoption!
2. Complete the initial paperwork.
In your Lifetime packet, there will be some initial paperwork to complete. This is not the final adoption paperwork and does not commit you to an adoption plan. It is informational and helps us learn more about you, your baby, and the type of adoption you are considering. Once we receive that, we are ready to help get you talking to one (or more!) adoptive familiesthat you have chosen.
Throughout the entire process, you have other options such as counseling, receiving help with expenses, and other items such as maternity clothes. Let your coordinator know how she can best help you, or ask her what your options are.
3. Match with a family.
We will set up a phone conversation with you and the family you have selected. We can be on the call with you if that helps. You can speak to more than one family if you wish. You can even email them if you prefer. As you get to know them, you will be able to decide if adoption is the right choice for your baby. Getting to know a family is an important step in this decision, and really helps women gain the clarity they need.
During this time, you can discuss options like future contact, naming the baby, and more! This is where you really set the stage for what your open adoption will look like. Your Lifetime adoption coordinator is walking through this with you, each step of the way – so you are never alone.
4. Complete the final adoption paperwork.
When it is time to deliver your baby, the adoptive parents you have chosen travel to your town. You decide how things go at the hospital. You can see and hold your baby, and spend time with him or her if you choose. You can also have the adoptive parents as involved at the hospital as you want them to be. These are all your choices! The baby is typically discharged with the adoptive parents, and you meet with an attorney or social worker in the next few days to sign the final adoption papers.
Remember, open adoption is not goodbye, it is “I’ll see you later, and we will always stay in touch!” Lifetime is here to help you learn about your choices in adoption and how an open adoption may be the right choice for you and your baby!
Remember, open adoption is not goodbye, it is “I’ll see you later, and we will always stay in touch!”
Snag my in-depth reference guide to best equip you for the journey ahead.
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