“Are you a Carrot, an Egg, or a Coffee Bean?”

Several months ago, I shared an inspirational piece from my favorite spiritual teacher, Fr. Greg, the rector at Holy Name Cathedral. It was called “I Wish You Enough.” 

Many of you commented on how much the story touched and inspired you. If you missed it or just want to read it again and pass it along, go here. 

This week, I’m passing on another gem from Fr. Greg. This message asks us to consider our well of resiliency and our view towards dealing with adversity:

“Are you a Carrot, an Egg, or a Coffee Bean?”

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life, and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved a new one arose. 

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. 

She let them sit and boil, without saying a word. In about 20 minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them into a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them into a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it into a bowl. 

Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me, what do you see?” 

“Carrots, eggs and coffee,” she replied. 

The mother brought her daughter close and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled center. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. 

The daughter then asked, “What does it mean, mother?” 

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity – boiling water – but each reacted differently. 

The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting: however, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile, and its thin shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water into something else. 

“Which are you?” she asked her daughter. “When adversity knocks at your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?” 

Which one are you? 

Are you a carrot that seems strong but when pain and adversity hits, do you become soft and lose strength? 

Are you the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with intense heat? After you are challenged by a trial like sheltering-in-place during a pandemic, have you become hardened? Does your shell look the same as before, but on the inside have you become bitter and carry a hardened heart? 

Or are you like the coffee bean, which changed the hot water–the very substance that brought the initial pain–into something tasty and fragrant. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. 

In reflecting upon this story, I have found that my response depends on the kind of day I’ve had and the challenges I’ve had to meet. While I long to be the coffee bean, there are days I am both a carrot and an egg. 

Which one might you be today, and which one will you strive to model tomorrow or the next day?

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