November is National Adoption Awareness Month!

During the month of November, we acknowledge those whose lives have been impacted by adoption, those who facilitate the adoption process, and the many children in the foster care system who are still waiting for permanent homes. The goal of National Adoption Month is to shed light on the adoption process and to highlight the positive impacts of adoption.

For me, adoption is not just another month dedicated to a good cause. It’s personal. 

My twin sister and I were three weeks old when our adoptive parents got a call from Catholic Charities in Chicago, informing them that two newborn girls were waiting for placement. Lucky for me that Catholic Charities had a firm policy of placing infants from a multiple birth pregnancy into the same household. I can’t imagine having lived my life without my identical twin by my side. Some of the things that my sister and I do and say confounds our families–and even us! When we were two years old, our adoptive parents adopted a little boy, and then remarkably my parents’ infertility issues faded away. They had three biological children of their own. I grew up in a truly blended family. Yet, I never had the sense that those of us who were adopted were treated any different from our younger siblings. 

In 2011, during National Adoption Month, I met my birth mom for the first time. My sister and I were fifty-one, and we had spent several years trying to locate her. I can honestly say that this event ranks as one of the most impactful events in my life. It was a moment that I had fantasized about for decades. Realizing it–with my twin sister by my side– made me feel like I was walking on air. I’m pleased to report that my birth mom, my sister, and I are still in active reunion, but like any relationship there have been sweet spots and rough patches. 

It took my adoptive mother four years to accept and acknowledge that my birth mother was back in my life, something I write about in my memoir, Twice a Daughter. And, one of the most important outcomes of my adoption search was the discovery of two half-siblings from my birth father’s side. All my siblings, biological and adoptive, continue to play an active role in the lives of my twin sister and me. I like to say that adoption gave me more family to love. I consider myself fortunate. Not only was my adoption experience positive, but my adoption search was also successful (I located both biological parents and attained full medical and family histories). Writing and speaking about my adoption experience and advocating for open records continues to fill me with purpose.

MORE ABOUT ADOPTION

5 FACTS ABOUT ADOPTION

1. Adoption statistic in U.S. families: One out of every 25 families with children have an adopted child.
2. Adopted Americans: Around 7 million Americans are adopted.
3. Average waiting time for getting adopted: The time an average child waits for an adoptive family is more than three years.
4. Adoption agencies in the U.S.: The U.S. has more adoption agencies than any other country.
5. International adoptions: Americans adopt children globally, although the numbers have declined since 2018.

(list is from National Today. com)

AND MORE…

SHOWS WITH ADOPTION-RELATED THEMES:

Grey’s Anatomy is ABC’s longest running series and was the brainchild of adoptive mom, Shonda Rhimes. The show follows the medical staff at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. During its15 seasons, viewers experienced birth mothers who made an adoption plan, parents who adopted children, and adoptees who learned as a child or an adult that they were adopted.

This is Us, now in season 4, follows the story of the Pearson family. Rebecca and Jack Pearson lost one of their triplets during childbirth and decide to adopt their son Randall, a newborn who was left at a fire station. The show does an excellent job in portraying transracial adoption.

Modern Family, the critically acclaimed ABC comedy, followed the lives of four families within one extended family. In the pilot episode, Mitchell, and his partner, Cameron, travel to Vietnam to adopt a baby girl. The series addressed some typical conversations that arise from international adoption and adoption by a same sex couple.

Found is a Netflix documentary which premiered in 2021. It chronicles the efforts of three Chinese American young women searching for their identity and history. Chloe is raised in a Jewish family; Sadie is living in Nashville; and Lily is in Oklahoma City.

Three Identical Strangers is a documentary released in 2018 and was directed by Tim Wardle. It is a true account about the lives of Edward Galland, David Kellman, and Robert Shafran, a set of identical triplet brothers adopted as infants by separate families. Fascinating and disturbing.

MY FAVORITE ADOPTION-RELATED READS:

• Nicole Chung, All You Can Ever Know
• Ann Fessler, The Girls Who Went Away
• Gabrielle Glaser, American Baby
• Betty Jean Lifton, Lost & Found
• Lisa Wingate, Before We Were Yours, Before & After
• Nancy Verrier, The Primal Wound

GREAT ADOPTION-RELATED PODCASTS:

The Forgotten Podcast aims to support the foster care community.

Adoptees On Podcast where adoptees discuss the adoption experience. 

Sex, Lies & The Truth Podcast:  A therapist and genealogical investigator narrate interviews with real people about their experiences with shocking DNA revelations

 The Honestly Adoption Podcast with Mike and Kristin Berry delivers weekly insights and strategies to help you thrive as a parent.

 Foster The Family | Real Mom Podcast One mom’s light-hearted musings and heavier broodings on family, foster care, & adoption.

The Adoption Connection | Podcast by and for Adoptive Moms is for the adoptive mom looking for hope, practical tools and friends who understand.

Who Am I Really? Podcast shares the journeys of adoptees who have searched for and found members of their biological family.

FOLLOW ME HERE:

• On November 16th, Julie will speak in-person with Tracee’s Book Club in Sarasota.
• Dec. 4-8th, Julie will attend the Her Spirit Women’s Writing Retreat in Santa Fe.
• Dec. 7th, Julie will guest on Simon Benn’s podcast, Thriving Adoptees.
• On December 15th, Julie will speak to the Kappa Alpha Theta Book Club in Sarasota.

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