Anniversaries, Meditation & Mediums

Many of you know from following me on social media that November 30th would have been my 38th wedding anniversary. To get through that benchmark moment, I filled the day with “be kind to me” activities: writing time, meditation, a massage, and dinner out with girlfriends. To honor my late husband, I connected with his spiritual energy through a medium–more on that in a future post! 

Over the years, my husband and I celebrated our anniversary in typical fashion: cards, flowers, chocolate, and sometimes a nice dinner out. But one of the most unique gifts was when we splurged on a course to learn the practice of Transcendental Meditation (TM). 

Why TM? 

As parents managing the lives of four busy children and growing a family-owned business, we were keen to learn how to improve our health, to manage stress, and to increase creativity. We were drawn to TM because it doesn’t focus on breathing or chanting like other forms of meditation. Rather, it encourages a restful state of mind beyond thinking. 

The TM center with which we connected was in downtown Chicago. After viewing a short introductory film explaining the benefits of TM, we paid the fee and scheduled check-ins for the forthcoming months. During these appointments, we met with individual TM counselors for one-on-one coaching to clarify how to practice TM effectively. These counselors issued us each a personal mantra, which is a variation on the collective “om” often chanted in yoga classes.

One of the benefits to personalized TM coaching was the opportunity to share frustrations or difficulties that we encountered during our two, twenty-minute at-home practice sessions. We learned that if the doorbell rang or an emergency bathroom break became necessary, we need only resume where we left off. No need to start over again. We immediately experienced how the mind quiets after the first few minutes repeating our mantra, and we also discovered how random thoughts passed in and out breaking the brain’s ability to “zone out.” Our coaches assured us this was normal, and that we need not be frustrated–we returned to our mantra whenever this occurred. 

It’s been ten years since we completed the transcendental meditation course as a couple. We took our commitment seriously because we wanted the benefits that TM provides. Long–term practice can lead to positive changes including improved memory, resilience to stress, lower overall anxiety, and greater life satisfaction. My husband and I often meditated together in the same room, and that mutual support and experience was deeply satisfying to us as a couple.

I still meditate twice a day. Every day. I find that my body has come to expect it, and it performs better because of the mental time out. I have no doubt that the patience I grant myself and to others is a direct result of my meditation practice, and I credit TM for assisting me in managing the numerous challenges of my new life as a surviving spouse. 

There’s more…

As my writing career evolved, I found that my creative output peaked in the minutes following my practice. So, I schedule significant writing projects to commence following my mediations. 

I urge you to consider taking up a meditation practice as gift to yourself either before the holiday crazies set in or as a goal for the new year. And if you convince your spouse or partner to join in, the opportunity for an improved and strengthened relationship is entirely possible.

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