That Girl, This Life
Weekly posts that focus on identity, family, and life’s quirky moments.
When I was a teenager growing up with my twin sister in the suburbs of Chicago, afternoons often revolved around watching television. One of our favorite shows was That Girl, starring Marlo Thomas as Ann Marie, a young actress making her own way in New York City. I didn’t realize at the time how groundbreaking the program was—the first sitcom centered on a single woman whose story wasn’t defined by marriage or motherhood. Ann Marie was ambitious, independent, and wore her courage and charm like a favorite hat. For two small-town girls, she made the world seem full of delicious possibility.
Decades later, while researching my adoption, I discovered that “Ann Marie” was also the name my birth mother had given me before my twin sister and I were adopted. That discovery felt like a cosmic coincidence, a thread connecting a childhood heroine to my own beginnings—a reminder that our stories often circle back to us in unexpected ways.
So in 2017, when I was setting up my author website and in need of a blog title, That Girl, resurfaced immediately. But I wasn’t merely that girl anymore—the one trying to set herself apart from her twin, find her place in a family of six, and make sense of a closed adoption. I had become this woman: a mother, widow, grandmother, and author still asking life’s essential questions: Who am I? Where did I come from? What does it mean to belong? What was life asking of me, and what should I give back in return?
That Girl, This Life felt like the perfect bridge between the dreamer I once was and the woman I am today. That Girl evokes the daring and curiosity of youth; This Life conveys presence, a grounding in the here and now. Together they capture the essence of my work: how the roles I inhabit intersect with the world around me and how I derive meaning from the ordinary threads of living.
Here, I share stories about family, friendship, loss, resilience, and the quirky, tender moments that give life its character. Some pieces began as journal entries and early morning reflections, others grew out of observations, everyday moments, and travel adventures. All are part of an ongoing conversation between my past and present selves—between that girl who imagined a life full of promise and this woman who is living it, one story at a time.
Welcome to That Girl This Life. I’m glad you’re here.
Adoption Searching is like being stuck in ‘no man’s land’
How my adoption search and reunion put me into ‘no man’s land’.
Adoption Anger
Adoption anger is real. I share examples and advice in this week’s post.
When I Adopted Them
Discover how and why I was an adoption holdout.
Adoption As Regifting
It might be crazy but can adoption be considered regifting?
I’m In!
I love the phrase, “I’m in.” It connotes different things in diverse situations to various age groups. Join me for a fun exploration of the many meanings of this little phrase.
How The Polar Vortex Tried To Ruin My Birthday
Mother Nature smothered the Midwest with dangerous cold air in time to mar a special occasion.
I Am Not Anti-Adoption Either
A fellow adoption blogger, Lost Daughters, recently posted an essay titled, “I Don’t Believe in Adoption Anymore.” Here is my take on that post.
The Smile Project
An update on my New Year’s resolution.
Putting Post Adoption Into Words
A compelling tale from a fellow adoptee reposted from Lost Daughters.
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