White Elephant

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I blinked and foil-wrapped chocolate Santas, spools of red and green ribbon, and cinnamon scented pinecones line the end of the grocery store aisles.

The token Halloween decorations I put up in October still clutter my laundry room counter. When I open my laptop, the stack of Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals outnumber my personal emails.  Sprinkled among these online retail coupons are reminders from charities about Giving Tuesday. This morning, my youngest daughter forwarded a link to a holiday wish. Knots riddle the muscles between my neck and shoulder blades. 

Much like homework feels to schoolkids on Sunday evening, the holiday shopping ‘scaries’ have descended upon me.

Over the past two holiday seasons, I resolved to simplify my shopping list: buy less and purchase only useful gifts.  Last year, I located wallets for my son and husband sculpted in the shape of a man’s front trouser pocket. For my married children, I purchased flash drives, spa certificates, and gift cards to trendy local restaurants.  My three daughters received slim handbags big enough to accommodate a lipstick, cell phone, house key, and an ID. Inside the purse, I stuffed a tissue-wrapped pair of glitzy earrings for that special evening out. Stockings held breath mints, travel-size toiletries, makeup brushes and an SPF lip gloss. As I looked at the wrapped presents under the tree, I congratulated myself on cornering clever and practical gifts.  Sending my family back to their homes with suitcases no thicker than when they arrived was satisfying.

Before I downsized and moved out of Chicago’s western suburbs to NW Indiana, I hosted an annual White Elephant party in late January.  If you are not familiar with this party concept, pay attention.  Over the course of a year, all of us receive gifts that while lovely may not be our style, size or fit our current decorating scheme. Most of us own too many scented candles, decorative hand towels, fancy soaps and nut dishes. Stockpiling these items to trade or gift at a White Elephant party is not only purposeful, it’s fun.  

The White Elephant party model goes like this.  Wrap one or two of your unused items.  Invite twenty or more friends.  Purchase plenty of wine, snacks and dessert.  Put numbers into a hat or bowl and pass.  Guests pull a number and that is the order in which a gift is selected, opened or traded.  Party goers can steal a present as many as three times before it is ‘dead’. Often the background story to the wrapped item is quirky or humorous. Once shared, laughter and the wine, binds the group in fellowship. At the end of the evening, each party participant leaves the event toting a new treasure.  

Over the summer I cleared out our second home to ready it for a renovation project. To my dismay, I discovered several of the sensible items I gifted my immediate family not quite a year ago.  Unopened flash drives, makeup brushes, and wallets hid in the bottom drawers of bathroom vanities. I shoved a handful of SPF lip balms into the bottom of my purse and stuffed the remaining items in my suitcase to cart home to my White Elephant gift cabinet.  On the shelf above the Tide and dryer sheets, I made a place for my family’s unwanted Christmas gifts among colorful scarves, lavender soaps, and extra costume jewelry. 

Determined to chase away the season’s shopping ‘scaries’ and to ease my beleaguered back, I’ve deleted the junk email coupons. I saved my daughter’s shopping link to consider for her January birthday. To further liberate myself from the holiday frenzy, I honed my gift-giving goals even further.  Last year, I shopped extensively to unearth no-nonsense gifts I thought my family would appreciate.  This year, my goal is to avoid my hard-earned dollars hiccupping back into the White Elephant cabinet.

As boring as it seems, I plan to sleigh the season with vetted products, pre-determined gift cards, and charitable donations in the names of my loved ones.  Compared to yesteryear, these are hefty adjustments to my holiday routine. One thing won’t change.

The White Elephant party is already inked for mid-January. I anticipate selecting the right mix of wines, deliberating over the perfect snacks, and purchasing a naughty but yummy dessert for my friends. Compared to all the holiday wrapping and shipping I used to do, gift wrapping this season’s White Elephant treasure will be a snap. 

While I will miss watching my kids’ surprised faces as they open the presents I selected for them, I appreciate more the shopping time and dollars saved.  Need I mention that giggling over unwanted, unnecessary gifts is less an assault to the ego at a White Elephant party than it is on Christmas morning (or months later when culling bathroom vanities)?

Giving the right gift is an art. Taking the guesswork out of it this year’s stress-free holiday goal.

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